Thanks for Treating us Well.

Lately I watched a movie known as The Stoning of Soraya. The movie is about how women in some parts of the world face irresistible torture (Stoning in the film), how they are over powered and how hundreds of women went through such tortures.

Stoning, or lapidation, is a form of capital punishment whereby a group throws stones at a person until the person dies. This punishment is one of many uncivil punishments, imposed to offenders in some parts of the world. Slower than other forms of execution, stoning is a form of execution by torture.

Women’s vulnerability and helplessness is clearly portrayed in the movie (I am not going to talk about the whole movie here). Women are considered low; they are made to live in their husband’s authority and treated like slaves, not life partners.  Despite many human rights protests and Conventions against women, this type of practice seems to still exist in some corners of the world. Women are tormented in the name of God and Religion.

Although our Religion also agrees that women are less fortunate than men (no concrete evidence though), I am very thankful that this fact is not very seriously taken as an excuse to victimize women in Bhutan. Of course we have minor domestic problems in which women fall victim in most of the cases but it is nothing compared to the treatment women receive in some part of the world.

We are considered tender, not Incapable and helpless. We have the power to treat our husbands as humans, not Gods. We don’t have to bow to our husbands, we are not tight lipped, we discuss matters with our husbands, and our sons respect their mothers. Most importantly we are not murdered on any reasonable or unreasonable grounds. Rather our mere presence is respected and our importance in society is highly emphasized.

I, as a Bhutanese woman, feel very lucky to be born here and I don’t resent for being born as a girl. Therefore, I would like to thank each and every men of Bhutan for their admiration and helping us to live with honor and integrity. I pray and Hope that our men will continue to support us and continue to resist violence against women. THANKS FOR TREATING US WELL!

Facebook fever?

Visiting the FACE with a BOOK to write on (our real face don't have it), has become like a addiction to me. At first it was interesting but now I am kind of fed up with it but still my day seems incomplete If I don't visit it. Its like there will be attendance or like I am going to miss a big time from history If I don't log in there.

 Open facebook and you will be stuck in there, whether you have friends to chat or not. At first it was quite reluctant to chat with anonymous or unknown people but now one don't have to know the other to chat. Sometimes i feel like I am in an interview, with never ending questions one after another. At times its interesting meeting new people but more annoying.

While it has both pros and cons according to how we use it, If we think hard there are million of things that could happen there. While we can keep in touch with our friends and family, existing relationship, we can make new relationships and sometimes break relationships too.

What is more surprising to me is that people gets married by chatting on facebook. Chatting with unknown and saying hi, how are you? seems okay but MARRIAGE? It seems to me like a dawn of BIG day with chains of trouble. To me the mere thought of a serious life with family, kids and all the frigging responsibility itself is scary. And more scarier If we don't know that person. What if the person turns out to be a total Freak?  What If we are totally opposite to each other? How are we going to end that BIG day together?
 Just my crazy thought!

The Lady - Aung San Suu Kyi.

"The Lady" is a worshipful film about the Myanmar opposition leader, Aung San Suu Kyi by Luc Besson. Aung San Suu Kyi is a Burmese dissident and pro- democracy leader who is now the opposition leader of Burma. 

The film follows Suu Kyi's long journey towards Burma's Democracy, the years she spent under house arrest, her message of nonviolence in the face of a violently repressive regime, and the sacrifices she made for her political passion.

Ms. Aung San Suu Kyi was played by Michelle Yeoh and referred to as Suu in the movie. The movie starts with a scene which depicts the death of Suu’s father, Aung San, a nationalist hero, who was assassinated by rivals in the Burmese army in 1947, when his daughter(Suu) was a child. Aung San Suu Kyi is first presented as a housewife and a scholar, wife of an academic, Michael Aris, who is a leading western scholar on Bhutanese, Himalayan and Tibetan culture. 

She gets a call that her mother is dying  in Burma and  Suu Kyi returns to Rangoon, Burma to care for her. Her country (Burma)  is ruled by a military junta, at that time.  Back in Burma, Suu Kyi gets shocked by the violent army response to student protests: shooting point-blank into unarmed crowds.

 Being the daughter of the father of Independent Burma, Suu’s presence causes discomfort for the ruthless, paranoid and superstitious generals who rule the country. They wanted to get rid of her, but her prominence and her international connections  prevent them from using the usual violent methods. So, they asks her to leave the country and  when she refuses, she is placed under a house arrest which stretches, in various forms, over decades. 

Initially, her family are allowed to visit her in the house arrest but gradually they are not allowed to make visits based on various excuses.  The film is also a love story, illuminating the remarkable relationship between Suu and her husband. He strives to promote her candidacy for a Nobel Peace Prize hoping that this international title would help loosen the grip upon Suu by the Military Junta and succeeds. 

Their separation is made more painful when Michael is diagnosed of having prostrate cancer. Micheal tries to get a visa to come to Burma but it gets rejected every time.  Suu tries to come out from the house arrest to be by her love's side in the last days of his life but that could mean spilling water over what she and her husband did so far. Micheal dies on his 53rd birthday when Suu is still in house arrest.

The movie does not include very recent developments, so it triggered me to browse and read more about the International heroine.  On the evening of 13 November 2010, Suu Kyi was released from house arrest. The film is reliably inspiring but also frequently unsatisfying.

Burma is a resource-rich country but one of the least developed countries in the world especially due to political instability. Burma is one of the highest rated country in terms of human rights violation and injustice.

She is still a NEW BRIDE to me.

It's been a year and I'm still awestruck by our Royal Bride. Her simple being, simple beauty and her simple way of everything leaves me mesmerized, even if it's just looking at her portrait.  I feel like the wedding just happened yesterday. She is still a new bride to me.

Time flew off like a flash and in this 1 year, I hope our royal couple might have had a cherish-able time together. I would like to wish your majesties a very happy life ahead and pray that your lovely union will bring immense happiness to Bhutan and Bhutanese. May this unification be always magnificent......A VERY HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! 

Hidden version of Dechen - The real me......

There is a hidden Dechen inside me who comes out quite frequently these days. The usual me is what I am always but there exists a hidden version of me also. This does not mean I change moods and I have two faces, I don't want people to understand me this way (gig).

I always thought I am what I am and there's no other me in me but I was wrong. There is another me in me. Unlike in usual moments, that unusual me comes out astonishingly sometimes. When people bring me down, when people create unnecessary miscommunication, when incidents occur involving personal greed and dishonesty, having draining relationships, and of course my own negativity. I used to be an easy girl, someone who accepts almost everything, someone who says OK and fine to everything without thinking much. Now, I realize that I am no more the same.

 I sometimes wonder, " Is this the identification that my ego is rising?" I sometimes assume myself going the wrong way. Many times I had to conjecture myself of growing up wrongly. Nevertheless, this is me and that's how I have become now. This is the real ME! I have my own wish to do things, my own pride, my own justification, my own concept of self and my own identity.

What ever may be the reason, I would like to take this change as a sign of growth, maturity, intellectual development and advancement. I think simply acquisition of knowledge doesn’t mean you’re growing; growing happens when you know how you live and change.  May be that's what construction of Moral self means.

Although the real ME was hidden from me till now, I think this little watchdog was right inside my head ever since - always there watching me.  It was born and raised by my family, friends, teachers and society at large. At first it was a little weird to accept this hidden me but now this hidden version of me is lot more better than the usual me.

The sun is always shining on our life.  What we should do is typically think -  How far I’ve come, or how far I have to go?  My strengths, or my weaknesses?  The best that could happen, or the worst that might come to be?  We have to pay attention to our self-talk because maybe, just maybe, the only thing that needs to shift in order for us to experience more happiness, more love, and more success, is our way of thinking - WHO I AM AND WHAT I CAN BE!!!!

My mother......my angel

  
You have always been there,

from the day I was born

and still I am nothing without you
though I have to live without you now.

You call to say hello

You accepts me as I am

That helps me to know deep down
how much you really care

You never let me lose hope

You've always gave me courage
You taught me to live life 

and to love living.

Even though I might not say it,
I really appreciate all you do
So powerfully blessed is how I feel
for having a mother like you.

When I'm a mom

I hope I'll be like you.............I am missing you a Lot.

Is this My Strength or Weakness?

Well! I am 20 years old now and I still get wronged many times. I don't know whether it is my Strength or weakness to forgive people so easily. I forgive and forget easily when something bad happens or when some one hurts me. I have been considering this as my strength till now but I realize now that this is a great weakness sometimes.

I get into abusive relationships because I am, in a way too forgiving. I meet again and again with the same wrong person because I forget what had happened in the past and take it for granted that they will not repeat the same.

I was taught that by forgiving someone we are letting them off easy for what they have done.  When we don’t forgive others we are really harming no one but ourselves. While you are angry, hurt and frustrated about what has been done to you, the other person is enjoying life. While you are wasting time thinking about them, they are enjoying life not thinking about you.

Forgiveness means letting go of the anger and disappointment. If you do not expect someone to be your savior or saint, then they can't disappoint you , thus less need to forgive. Forgiveness allows YOU to go on living in emotional comfort despite whatever they did to you; it does not mean that you allow them to continue using your face as a welcome mat to wipe their feet.

I agree that Forgiving is a great thing to do but after all these years of experience I  would rather disagree. I came to this conclusion because I got wronged many times by the same person I forgave. There are many incidents where I got cheated and where I easily became their prey. So now I think Forgiving is not my kind of thing. May be it will depend upon situations and the way you do it and may be the way I did was wrong.

Now the worst thing I can do is to wonder........... Is Forgiving my strength or weakness!!!!!!!