The Habit of being Proactive

I've finished reading the first habit of effectiveness, "Be Proactive," and I want to share what I've learned. Being proactive means taking charge and being responsible, not just watching things happen. It's about looking after our growth, understanding our mistakes, and working on getting better. Being proactive also means knowing what we can and can't control. We don't waste time worrying about things we can't change, but focus on the things we can. The idea of the "circle of concern" and "circle of influence" was interesting. The "Circle of Concern" includes things we care about but can't control, while the "Circle of Influence" involves things we can directly impact and change through our actions. Covey emphasizes focusing on our Circle of Influence to become more effective. Instead of worrying about things we can't change, we should focus on improving ourselves and being more proactive, which can make things better.

The author, Stephen Covey, also talked about the power of "Have" and "Be" attitudes. I could relate to this. When our concerns are full of "haves" like "If only I have a better job" or "If only I had a nicer car," these are things we can't always control. Instead, we can make a positive change by shifting to "be" attitudes. For example, "I can be more hardworking" or "I can be more creative." If we want things to be different, we need to work on the things we can control.

After reading this, I'm taking a thirty-day challenge that the author suggests. Here's what I'm planning to do to be more proactive:

1. When I make a mistake, I'll admit it, fix it, learn from it, and correct right away.

2. I won't blame/ accuse others.

2. I'll be part of solutions, not problems. I'm going to try this for a month with myself, my family, my students, and my friends. I'll share my experiences after a month. If you're interested, you can try some of these too and tell me how it goes in the comments.

P/PC

There’s this concept I find very valuable (again from the same book, "7 Habits of Highly Effective People"), and it's called "P/PC," which stands for "Production" and "Production Capability." Let me break it down for you in my own words:

 

Production (P): This is the result or output of our efforts. It's what we get when we work on something. For example, if we have a garden, the vegetables we grow in it are the production.

 

Production Capability (PC): This is like the health and quality of the garden itself. It's the ability to produce more vegetables in the future. So, if we take good care of the soil, water it, and keep it healthy, our garden will have a strong production capability. Now, balancing P/PC means not just focusing on the immediate result (the vegetables) but also taking care of what allows us to produce more in the long run (the healthy garden).

 

Here's how we can use this concept in our life:

Example: Let's say we have a job, and we work really hard to get a promotion (that's the production). But if we work so hard that we get stressed and burn out, we might harm our production capability (our health and well-being).

 

Balancing: To balance P/PC, we should work hard for our promotion but also take care of our health by managing stress, getting enough rest, and staying physically active. This way, we can achieve our short-term goals (production) while ensuring we can keep performing well in the long run (production capability). In our life, we should not just think about the immediate results but also about the ability to produce more in the future. It's about finding a healthy balance between what we do now and what helps us do it better over time.

 

In today's world, where things are very challenging in every aspect, I feel this concept is very relevant. It reminds me to not just focus on what I can achieve right now but also on what helps me keep achieving in the future. It's about finding a smart balance between what I do today and what keeps me going strong over time.

My understanding of Proactivity, Positive thinking, R and I

In the book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen R. Covey, proactivity and positive thinking are two distinct concepts. Proactivity means taking charge of your actions and choices. It's about being in control of your life and not letting external circumstances or other people determine how you respond to situations. Proactive people understand that they can choose their responses and take responsibility for their decisions. On the other hand, positive thinking is about maintaining a hopeful and optimistic outlook. It's about looking for the good in situations and believing that things can improve. While positivity is essential, it's not enough on its own. Proactivity goes a step further by encouraging you to take action and make positive changes in your life. 

The concept of "R" and "I" stands for Resourcefulness and Initiative. Resourcefulness means finding creative solutions to challenges and making the most of the resources available to you. It's about thinking outside the box and finding innovative ways to overcome obstacles. Initiative, on the other hand, is about taking the first step and being proactive in pursuing your goals. It means not waiting for someone else to tell you what to do but taking the initiative to make things happen. Together, resourcefulness and initiative are essential qualities for personal and professional effectiveness, as they empower you to overcome challenges and achieve your objectives.

Discovering Mindfulness through Youngey Mingyur Rinpoche's Videos

In today's rapidly changing world, the significance of mindfulness has grown immensely. As the world evolves around us, remaining present has become crucial. Mindfulness isn't just a fleeting trend; it serves as an anchor connecting me to my inner self and the external world. For the past six months, I've been immersing myself in the mindfulness videos of Youngey Mingyur Rinpoche, actively practicing what I've learned.

Rinpoche's remarkable ability to simplify complex ideas and explain them like a friend truly sets him apart. But what's even more appealing is his approachability and positive vibe. It's refreshing to see that a meditation guide can be relatable, humorous, and uplifting. Reading his book "Restful Mind" last year has inspired me to learn more and engage in mindfulness practices. Additionally, I've become used to watching his YouTube shorts, which are catchy and easy to enjoy. These shorts, typically under a minute, are not only convenient but also highly enriching. I've also been using Rinpoche's videos to help my students grasp the concept of mindfulness. They connect with his charm and relatability, finding his guidance both endearing and appealing. Introducing them to this wonderful resource feels like sharing a treasured secret, enabling us to collectively unwind and forge deeper connections. If you're contemplating the journey into mindfulness, I strongly recommend delving into Rinpoche's videos. They've opened my eyes to the beauty within each moment, revealing the profound impact that even a handful of videos can have. Why not give it a shot? I'm certain you'll find it as rewarding and enlightening as I have.

Discovering New Perspectives: Lessons from 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Sometimes, reading books is easy when we just read and know the meanings of words. But, it becomes harder when we really want to understand and digest the meaning. So, for me, reading books needs a lot of effort and energy. That's why I get bored and lose focus when reading non-fiction books. To fix this, I started writing down the main things I learn from books in my blog. I hope this will help me understand better and stay interested, and also keep me going with my blogging.

Lately, I began reading a book titled "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen R. Covey. At the start of the book, it talks about "Paradigm and Principles" before introducing us to the 7 habits. The portion on paradigms and principles focuses on helping us understand the significance of paradigms and how they affect the way we behave and the results we achieve. He defines paradigm as the way we see, perceive, understand and interpret the world. 

Picture: Google

While the author was explaining why changing how we see things is important, there was a story that really made me think. I want to share it here:

 

“I remember a mini-paradigm shift I experienced one Sunday morning on a subway in New York. People were sitting quietly- some reading newspapers, some lost in thought, some resting with their eyes closed. It was a calm, peaceful scene.

 

Then suddenly, a man and his children entered the subway car. The children were so loud and rambunctious that instantly the whole climate changed.

 

The man sat down next to me and closed his eyes, apparently oblivious to the situation. The children were yelling back and forth, throwing things, even grabbing people's papers. It was very disturbing. And yet, the man sitting next to me did nothing.

 

It was difficult not to feel irritated. I could not believe that he could be so insensitive as to let his children run wild like that and do nothing about it, taking no responsibility at all. It was easy to see that everyone else on the subway felt irritated, too. So finally, with what I felt was unusual patience and restraint, I turned to him and said, "Sir, your children are really disturbing a lot of peo- ple. I wonder if you couldn't control them a little more?"

 

The man lifted his gaze as if to come to a consciousness of the situation for the first time and said softly, "Oh, you're right. I guess I should do something about it. We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. I don't know what to think, and I guess they don't know how to handle it either."

 

Can you imagine what I felt at that moment? My paradigm shifted. Suddenly I saw things differently, and because I saw differently, I thought differently, I felt differently, I behaved differently. My irritation vanished. I didn't have to worry about controlling my attitude or my behavior; my heart was filled with the man's pain. Feelings of sympathy and compassion flowed freely. "Your wife just died? Oh, I'm so sorry! Can you tell me about it? What can I do to help?" Everything changed in an instant.”

This story made me realize that sometimes we don't really know much about things that happen in our everyday life. We live alongside others, but sometimes we quickly decide what we think about them based on what they say or do. We don't really stop to think more, and just one talk or thing they do can completely change how we see them. But, like the story says, it's very important to know everything before we decide. I believe if we take time to really understand instead of just guessing and assuming, the world could be much better. It could make our minds feel calm and make life easier even when things are hard sometimes.

 

But you know, it's not always easy. We have a lots of things happening in our own lives, and trying to really understand what someone else is feeling or thinking can be hard. But we can't just ignore what they're going through. We need to understand and help each other, but sometimes we don't realize how important it is to be connected and help each other. So, where and how should I decide what to do? How can we be nice to others even when we're having a tough time ourselves? I'm curious about these things as I keep reading.

 

There's something else the author talked about that caught my attention. When we have problems, we usually look for quick ways to fix them, like getting advice or watching videos that seem to tell us how to fix things. But the author says it's like using makeup or taking medicine for a headache. Although it solves our problem temporarily, the real issue is still there. I'm really excited to learn how to actually fix the real problems instead of just the quick answers through this book and the 7 habits we need to imbibe to become an effective person. I'll keep sharing what I learn. Please comment to help me encourage writing and sharing my thoughts.