Is this My Strength or Weakness?

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Well! I am 20 years old now and I still get wronged many times. I don't know whether it is my Strength or weakness to forgive people so easily. I forgive and forget easily when something bad happens or when some one hurts me. I have been considering this as my strength till now but I realize now that this is a great weakness sometimes.

I get into abusive relationships because I am, in a way too forgiving. I meet again and again with the same wrong person because I forget what had happened in the past and take it for granted that they will not repeat the same.

I was taught that by forgiving someone we are letting them off easy for what they have done.  When we don’t forgive others we are really harming no one but ourselves. While you are angry, hurt and frustrated about what has been done to you, the other person is enjoying life. While you are wasting time thinking about them, they are enjoying life not thinking about you.

Forgiveness means letting go of the anger and disappointment. If you do not expect someone to be your savior or saint, then they can't disappoint you , thus less need to forgive. Forgiveness allows YOU to go on living in emotional comfort despite whatever they did to you; it does not mean that you allow them to continue using your face as a welcome mat to wipe their feet.

I agree that Forgiving is a great thing to do but after all these years of experience I  would rather disagree. I came to this conclusion because I got wronged many times by the same person I forgave. There are many incidents where I got cheated and where I easily became their prey. So now I think Forgiving is not my kind of thing. May be it will depend upon situations and the way you do it and may be the way I did was wrong.

Now the worst thing I can do is to wonder........... Is Forgiving my strength or weakness!!!!!!!




Comments

  1. TSHEWANG DORJIOctober 2, 2012 at 11:36 PM

    Nice Observations!
    well, may be this is the very nature of life. Life hardly seems to be on our side!. But all in all I think Forgiveness is Strength; because not all have that quality and i think it is never wrong to forgive and forget; it only means a better 'you'!
    Keep Posting!...

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousOctober 3, 2012 at 1:25 AM

    Dechen Cuty,
    Well written piece...really a heart storming article.keep it up dear.as i text u earlier,kutch kutch ho ta na...as same as before, forget and forgive everything.if you or another 1 is wrong, somebody will some day punish surely...
    really enjoyed your personal thing dear..keep u.......

    ReplyDelete
  3. PaSsuOctober 3, 2012 at 5:35 PM

    Forgiveness is sure your strength, but "it does not mean that you allow them to continue using your face as a welcome mat to wipe their feet."(Nice line). You seem to be hanging on some people, let go, and you will never have to forgive them.
    Best wishes.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Dechen UgyenOctober 3, 2012 at 9:31 PM

    Thanks Azhim Sonam for the comment and your compliments. As you said life mai babhut kuch hot hai, through which we have to learn how to live life. Do keep reading and inspiring me.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dechen UgyenOctober 3, 2012 at 9:41 PM

    Thanks Passu sir for going through my post. You are right and as you said I am finally letting them go now......so that I don't have to be a WELCOME mat anymore. And I have a request for you if you don't mind. Please do correct my mistakes when you go through because I look up to you in terms of writing. I hope to write good things like you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. PaSsuOctober 3, 2012 at 10:53 PM

    Dechen, you are too good for your age. don't worry about mistakes, I don't worry at all.
    You are doing good so far, keep the flow!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Dechen UgyenOctober 4, 2012 at 12:06 AM

    Thanks a lot Passu sir. Keep on inspiring me.

    ReplyDelete

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